March is Trisomy awareness month. Trisomy is a term I was completely unfamiliar with until last June when we found out at 10 weeks pregnant our baby was a boy and that he was diagnosed Trisomy 18. We were told to consider termination because our baby was “incompatible with life” (All the while, my heart and entire body turned inside out). We have struggled with getting pregnant and carrying babies full-term for years. Knowing God is the Giver of Life, we were not about to take his life away on our own. If he was truly “incompatible with life”, then my Heavenly Father was going to have to take him home when He was ready.
It wasn’t a hard decision to continue the pregnancy, but it was torture knowing that he may pass away any day or at any moment. We lost our baby boy, Eli, at 18 weeks and would give anything to have him with us right now. He would have been born on Jan. 1st, 2017. I don’t say this for sympathy, or for anyone to feel sorry for us. I say all this because in this nightmare situation, there is HOPE and another “option” than to terminate a baby’s life just because they have an extra chromosome.
There is an OPTION to truly CELEBRATE your baby’s life! To enjoy the kicks, to see them squirm on an ultrasound every chance you get, and to hear their heartbeat as much as possible. As heart wrenching as it is to have your baby cremated and to bury a piece of your soul, I (not for one second) do NOT regret continuing my pregnancy and embracing every second with Eli in my belly.
Trisomy 18 was the worst news I’ve ever been given, but I’m so thankful the Lord gave us Eli (no matter how short his life was). I look forward to the day we get to see him in heaven with our other babes. If someone you know is given the diagnosis of T18 for their baby, please know they have another option other than termination. A life is a life regardless of the number of chromosomes. Of course, this is our story; every mom has individual situations and circumstances with this heartbreaking diagnosis.
I will always be thankful to be Eli’s mom.